So, I'm watching the Civil War game (Oregon St v. University of Oregon, for those not in the know) and during halftime, there was a Q&A segment with Lou Holtz, one of the most successful college football coaches of all time, and now a commentator/analyst for ESPN. So, one of the questions (asked by former NBA player Magic Johnson) was "What are the biggest differences between players today than those thirty years ago?" Mr. Holtz named two things: the idea of entitlement as opposed to obligation, and respect. He went onto explain that players today feel they are entitled to what they want over their obligation to the team. His second comment was in regards to how they don't respect other people, because they don't respect themselves.
Amen! I agree completely. I have some very challenging individuals in my classroom this year. I struggle with these two issues a lot. It's interesting how my students are quick to demand they should be able to say/do/act however they wish because for me to tell them not to say/do/act in some way interferes with their freedom of speech/religion/culture/etc. None of them ever stand up and tell those who are disturbing the learning environment, that they are infringing on the rights of those wishing for an education. At the same time my students are mean. They don't seem to comprehend the value of kindness. And that, to me, boils down to respect.
I struggle with this because I don't know where we've gone wrong in accepting so little from people. I never, ever would have imagined telling my parents or teachers or anyone in a position of authority to "f#@k off" or called them an "asshole" or a "bitch". (Yes, I've heard all these and more from my students). So I'm left to wonder, what do we do now?
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It is a lot harder short term to teach my kids respect and fight them on chores, homework, manners. It requires a long term perspective as well as making sure that we are being good models. But as a former high school teacher I know it will pay off. Though in moments of exhaustion and frustration I too have been guilty of taking the easy way out and giving in to the whining or demands. Turns out that just feeds the beast.
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